Preface at the End

I like to know how movies end

before I start

How much do I invest

if prescience is possible

When death is far away

can I love a little more

My time is that precious

My heart is that sacred

My grief is that engrossing

that a spoonful

sours any milk I kept behind

Would stone instead of bone

gravel in place of saliva

wet mortar for blood

find me any more secure

than a pallet of promises

The condensation is inside the house

windows turned to block glass

no where to see

no one on the other side

only what I already

allowed in the house

I can’t see

Run from room to room

right brain to left

and I still can’t see

how it ends

How can I manage

another day

another night

another forsaken turn

on a wheel

that I want to smash

and recycle into

cages for tomato plants

but I can’t find a door

big enough to let it out

and I kill every plant I touch

Should I be the one

behind the metal

past brought it here

unwilling to future

present

enough

to build

to keep

the ones outside

safe

from

me

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